Trust is everything
Last night I wrote my list of things to do for work and personal.
For work, the list was long. For personal, I wrote three things. As I began my day, my morning plan got disrupted.
One of the personal things changed. I disagreed with someone. I felt I was taken advantage of. From feeling trust and in control, I felt untrusting and worried.
This disruption was hard to shake off. I tried to go back to my work, but my mind didn’t cooperate. I kept going back to the turmoil.
I paused and focused on my breath. I reflected on what happened and why I couldn’t let it go. I realized that my worry and stress about the situation was a break in trust.
I thought a situation was under my control, and the outcome was the one I want it. I struggled to accept that what I was hoping for would not happen. I tried to re-establish trust, but I couldn’t.
When we feel we can’t trust people, it is a nerve-racking thing. Our brain thrives on feeling safe. Sensing someone is threatening our emotional sense of safety triggers alarms in the brain.
You feel you want to run, scream, punch and avoid the discomfort.
But often, that is not possible, especially at work. We need to stay calm and in control. But inside, it feels nerve-wracking.
I had to accept the situation and relinquish to the uncomfortable outcome. I had no choice.
At home, my daughter noticed my discomfort and worry. She hugged me. Even though the situation didn’t change, the hug changed me. I came back to a sense of trust when I connected with my daughter.
Whether you are at work or home, use this story as I reminder of trust. We can control what happens with our plans. Sometimes we have to accept frustration and problematic outcomes. Feeling unsafe is temporary. Find a way to back to safety by connecting with something or someone that you trust.
Trust is the glue of life. It’s the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It’s the foundational principle that holds all relationships. –Stephen R. Covey
What do you do when you need to come back to feeling safe and trust?